Forgive as God Forgave You

I was one of those people who thought that forgiving was easier than forgetting, but it's not.

Head's full of thoughts, dilemmas about the good and bad. Self-reassurance is such a weird thing. You can fake your thoughts for some years by repeating a made-up line. Mine was, "I have forgiven him, I always have, I will.". Well, Enop has a habit of denial things that she tries not to bother (although it will always do) and ends up with a cognitive dissonance. Because it is easier to say so, than wasting our energy on hating, or anger.

But sometimes, you need to express your anger.

Emotional coping, and self-healing are probably the soft skill(s) that everyone should have and develop. Fight should be taught earlier, flight doesn't solve any problem (and the emotion usually stays still). True that being flight for problems is easier; go shopping, listen to music, make yourself busy when you are sad - but once the activity ends, you end up filling your brain with the same problems, and cry. Therefore, developing a fight reaction to problems is indeed needed. Analyze, think, and importantly, action for the problems.

Forgiveness is probably one of the hardest things that I am dealing right now. People usually tell to let go, forget to mention that we have to forgive before we let go. We can't let go of things that still make us angry, holding a grudge that grows bigger each day. It's like people tell us to sail, but forget to tell us releasing the anchor. Now, as I grow older, and socially am demanded to act maturer, no one can teach you about how you can forgive someone. Theoretically? Easy, google it and a bunch of forgiveness therapy articles is on your screen. Practically? Difficult enough. It's like riding a bicycle, you have to get bruises, hurt, and fall all over again until you balance yourself to move on. You may be stuck in one spot, you may fall, and sit for some time before you finally move on. Forgiveness has no tires, and pedals, that is why it is harder to practice. Magic - you practice something unseen, but can be felt.

Days grow longer, and you grow older, so does the feelings you keep inside.
Therefore, before it's too late and chronic, I am learning to forgive.


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